Summer Sanity Strategies for Parents

Summer is here! It’s that time of year both kids and parents look forward to, with great anticipation.
School-aged kids anticipate ten weeks of freedom, fun and memory-making. Parents anticipate ten weeks
of managing changes to their calendar, keeping the kids busy, and still trying to get them to bed on
schedule… while the later sunsets tell them there’s more fun to pack in before the day is over.
Consider the following strategies to help you keep your sanity and experience more enjoyment this
summer:

Evaluate & Adjust Expectations “All frustration comes from expectations” (Dr. John Lund);
Expecting your schedule to remain the same in the summer is simply not possible and your sanity will pay
the price if you don’t make some changes. The less you expect to get done, the less interrupted and
frustrated you feel. Try to read, relax, and play a little more in the summer, reminding yourself that, even
though you’re not getting much of your “to do list” done, you are doing some very important things (like
strengthening your relationships and resting up for the fall).  Expecting a little less in the summer can bring
a lot more peace of mind. 

Set Summer Routines
Though you may be eager to relinquish the rigor of the daily work/ school routine, children still thrive with
some sense of predictability. Talk about changes in your routine together. Consider your morning, bedtime
and mealtimes and other transitions in the day. How will things stay the same? How will things change?
Perhaps, you’ll agree that getting dressed should happen by a certain time in the morning? Having this
discussion can help set expectations for the summer and also provide that sense of stability children can
thrive on through routines. Regular bedtime scheduling is one of the best things you can do for your sake
and theirs. Why is this important? Children thrive on routine and that fact doesn’t change when the
weather’s warm and the daylight hours are longer. Lack of sleep is a recipe for cranky kids, and that’s an
unpleasant way to spend your summer. Fill the days full of fun, then get them into bed on time. When you
do, you’ll have happier kids and more energy for everyone to tackle each day.

Aim for a Balanced Schedule
While it certainly helps to have some scheduled activities each week, resist the temptation to sign up for too
many. Let’s face it… we live in an overscheduled world, and overscheduling wears both parents and kids
out. Instead, let this summer be a time to slow down from the hustle and bustle of the school year.
Planning one activity a day is plenty; and it’s ok to have days with nothing planned at all. It’s actually good
for kids to have “nothing to do” sometimes…it allows them to hear their own thoughts and invokes
creativity; it also helps them appreciate all they get to do at other times. So, be mindful with your
scheduling. Keeping children (and you) entertained but not drained is a delicate balance.

Brainstorm Anti-Boredom Ideas
Speaking from experience, few things can make a parent’s head spin like their kids saying, “I’m bored” on a
repetitive loop! While defaulting to TV or technology is an easy way out, it’s not really a memory maker for
the books though, is it? Make boredom brainstorming a regular event. Get everyone in on the planning,
and write down every idea, even the craziest ones. Depending on family dynamics, you can even make it a
contest to see who can come up with the best things to do for the week. Head online to family-friendly
websites or Pinterest to find budget-friendly family fun ideas and create a bucket list that you and your kids can start checking off this summer. It will make for an nice recap, especially for children going to school in
the fall to see how many of the ideas you put into action.

Take a Tech Break
Be as structured about technology time in the summer as you are during the school year. It’s tough to tear
kids away from screen time, but summertime is a great time to give those agile texting thumbs and screen-
scrolling eyeballs a break and focus on face-to-face family activities before giving access to screens. Have
some old school fun with board games and cards or get out into nature and enjoy the outdoors with
activities like swimming, fishing, hiking, gardening, berry picking, mini golf or sports. Use up as many of
those brainstorming bucket list ideas as possible!

Create Daily Quiet Time
Whether you’re a stay-at-home parent, a work-at-home parent, or a work-at work parent, you need some
time and space that is just for you. Being “on” all the time is a sure way to achieve parental burnout. To
prevent burnout, set up daily “quiet time”. Schedule 30 minutes to 1 hour of “quiet time” each
afternoon/evening. Help younger children settle down with books, a short show (a strategic time to use
screens), or colouring, set a timer and take some time for reading, a nap, or a special treat for yourself.
Older children can entertain themselves, just establish a rule so they know not to interrupt unless it’s urgent.
It’s good for everyone to have a break from activities and from each other. What can you do to establish
some quiet time each day?

Spend One-on-One Time
“Mommy can you play with me?” “Dad, can I help?” All-in family time is fun and important for family
bonding, but kids also need one-on-one time with you on a daily basis. It fills their attention buckets in
positive ways and meets their need for emotional connection. Even 10 minutes a day of one-on-one time
with each of your kids will go a long way to a smoother sailing summer. (Think more cooperation, less
complaining and more sibling harmony). During your one-on-one time, allow the kids to pick out what they
want to do with you and make it a priority. If that means the house is a bit more disorganized or the dishes
have to wait, that’s ok. This small investment in time will reap huge rewards in emotional connection and
better behavior.

Everyone Helps
All kids should be expected to take part in Family Contributions (a more appealing term than chores) during
the summer, and all year long. Being a contributor reminds kids that they are part of the big picture in how
a family works. Even little ones can take a role. Using the When-Then rule encourages children to pitch in.
For example, when your family contributions are complete, then you can enjoy your 30 minutes of tech time. No exceptions on this one or you’ll be negotiating it all summer long!
*If kids complain of being bored, have a jar filled with Family Contributions they can pick from to ease their
boredom :)

Commit to Acts of Service
One wonderful way to help steer clear of entitlement issues is to get children out of their comfort zones and
into the service of others. Get together as a family and talk about what kind of community service or charity
work you can do as a family this summer and then make a plan to make it happen. Make it a goal to do
one activity per week for the rest of the summer that includes service: Watering the neighbours plants,
doing a household job for an elderly family member or neighbour, even collecting household items that are no longer being used, for donation. There may also be opportunities to join a local beach or park cleanup
effort. There are a lot of ways that kids can give back, and summertime is the perfect time to fit some of that
service work in.

Do Activities that You Enjoy
Hiking? Reading? Drawing? Gardening? Whatever you love, look for opportunities to share it with your
children; it’s a great way to teach them more about who you are.
Find what you love and do it…you'll be so much more engaged in what you’re doing and that will impact
your kids in a positive way.

Be Flexible
All this being said, summer really is a test of flexibility. Just because you have a summer “plan” doesn’t
mean it won’t change…it will. Remembering strategy #1, if you can expect things to change, you
will handle those changes much better. Do your best to roll with it.

While it may seem like a long couple months of constant kid time ahead, it will be over in a blink. Start
making memories this weekend by putting together a family plan to make every moment count this
summer. Even if some of those moments are as simple as popcorn in a blanket fort, playing a round of
dominoes or spending quality coloring time. Enjoy every minute of it.
Wishing you and safe, enjoyable summer!

Renée